To all who have been following The Affair and have written of their own experiences, I thank you. It's been some time since I've written anything about it but I felt I owed all of those people an ending of some kind. Frankly the story has become very difficult to continue, on an emotional level and I was considering just dropping it, but for those that are interested, here is how things stand, and most likely will remain...
After Michael and Sara's encounter in August of 1994, after they had planned to be together by Christmas, Michael did leave his family, moving into an apartment some 60 miles west of San Antonio. (Sara, by this time had moved closer to him as her husband had once again been transferred) The day he made the move, he phoned Sara to let her know and was told by her that some legal problems had developed for her and her husband, and after discussing it with her attorney she was advised that it would not be in her best interests to leave her family at that time.
They kept in contact, on a daily basis and he would make the two hour trip to see her over her lunch hour every Saturday, and then drive the two hours back and spend the rest of the week alone, waiting for things to be resolved, so that they could finally be together. In March of 1996, he changed jobs and moved once again, this time to within a mile of where she lived, hoping to have more opportunities to be together. He gave her a key to the apartment so that she could stop by whenever she wanted to.
In April, he came home to find a note on his counter. She had written that she had been torn in two directions for too long and needed to make a decision, between her loyalty to her children and her love for him. The children won. She felt they would never forgive her if she ever left their father, and she couldn't make that sacrifice, not even for Michael. She said that she had closed her mailbox and for him not to write to her again. She would mail the key back to him the next day, which she did.
Michael respected her wishes, no matter that he was dying inside for want of contacting her. But in his heart, he knew the decision wouldn't last. They had been through this before, each of them at one time or another, and the other was always strong enough to wait until there was a change of heart...and so it was, this time, as well. A month later, he got a call from her. She was still torn, but still loved him and didn't want to just lose all contact with him.
Over the next several months, they saw and talked with each other less and less. The things they had to say to each other became more strained...conversation just didn't seem to be as easy anymore, most likely because they both knew, in their minds even if they didn't want to admit it in their hearts, that they would never really be together, and neither wanted to have to be hurt again. He was afraid of saying too much and frightening her off again, so they pretended to be just friends, even though it was obvious it was tearing them both up. They never did make love again after that letter in April. She was afraid to even let him touch her for fear of losing her resolve, and it was July before they even kissed again.
In August, she moved yet again. Not far, but far enough so they could no longer meet in the local park and talk with each other.
Now it is November and they haven't seen or talked with one another in over a month. Circumstances have made that impossible, and Michael has finally admitted to himself that it is time to get on with his life. He knows how difficult that is going to be, because in the back of his mind there will always be that comparison, that knowing that he blew his opportunity to be with his soulmate when he made the decision to leave that cold morning in Denver. In all of this, that is his only regret because he is convinced that was the one thing that could have made a difference in all of this.
To everyone that was hoping this was going to have a happy ending, let me assure you, nobody is more disappointed than I am, but this has always been a factual representation of both the happiest and saddest times in a life...all in less than a three year time span.
Copyright, 1995 - 2006 by Cindy. Not to be used without express permission.